Do a 180 to achieve a 360

This week and especially today, I have been battling my demons and my emotions. I really don't know where it all came from, but I realized today that I have to look myself in the face and get in touch with my pain in order to find my peace.

My entire life (up until about 5 years ago) I battled low self esteem. Yes, ME! When I tell people that, they find it hard to believe but it is so so true! I have to come clean so that I can continue to heal, but so that others can read my testimony and heal too.

I never thought that I was good enough. I had a lot of pressure on me at a young age to be the best at everything I do. I was identified as gifted when I was very young. That was a blessing and a curse at the same time. My mother expected and wanted a lot out of me, but she didn't really know how to motivate me to be the person that she thought I could be. Instead, I think her brand of motivation had the opposite effect. She wasn't abusive to me, but she was hard on me. She thought that comparing me to others would make me want to achieve, but it didn't. It made me resentful, which then made me lazy and uncaring. While I was battling that, I was also battling the fact that I was unattractive. I was very slim and people would always comment on it. It was so painful to go to school and hear all of the things that people would sometimes say. I was bullied in the 3^rd grade and then again tormented in the 6^th grade. By the time I reached Middle school, I was emotionally and mentally a train wreck. I was suffering in silence because I didn't want people to think I was weak. I didn't want people to know that I had weaknesses. That was one of the biggest mistakes of my life. When I got to High School, I was just mentally and emotionally unhealthy, but no one knew. I kept everything bottled up inside of me and kept people at arm's length. I felt ugly and unappealing to girls; in fact, I couldn't get a girl to even look my way, much less want to date me. People called me names and I believed what they called me. I became what they called me because I chose to believe I was weak and vulnerable. Life was hell.

I remember feeling like I wanted to kill myself. I could never bring myself to do it, but I contemplated suicide more times than I care to remember. I wrote the note but didn't have the guts to leave it. I wasn't even good at plotting to kill myself. What a waste of space I was. I plodded on and just really went through the motions of life until I graduated and went to college.

Now, the most amazing thing about all of this is that I had friends (lots of them), family that loved me and by Senior year I was THE most popular person in the entire school. It was great…but at the same time, it meant absolutely nothing. Nothing means NOTHING if you don't love yourself. I was in the greatest moment of my life, having the worst time of my life.

It wasn't until I learned that I was worth something because God made me to be SOMEBODY, that my life started to change. A couple of years ago, I took a hiatus from everything and everyone so that I could focus on God and focus on myself. It was during the month of February 2009. When March came, I was a NEW person. BRAND NEW!! What was on the INSIDE was now starting to be reflected on the OUTSIDE. I had to do a 180 (turning in the opposite direction of my pain and problems) to do a 360 (coming full circle to understand that my life is great and the best is yet to come).

I will continue this series in future blogs. I have so much more about me that I want to share and need to share. I will leave you with a poem I wrote in April of 2010 that captures all that I went through to become the man I am today. It is entitled:

 

"THE BETTERFLY"

February 09 a caterpillar went missing

Worn, busted and disgusted...tired of just existing.

Had to be alone with God so that He could reveal

all my hurts on the inside. It was time to heal.

Time to let go of all the pain that I've traveled with all these years.

All the hurt, all the fear, all the doubt, all the tears.

Time for a new man to emerge with purpose and drive;

with new determination and a new fire inside.

Time to stop dressing up the OUTSIDE to make my inside SEEM cool,

realizing I have been living my life backwards. What a fool. What a fool!

Cuz you see change, REAL CHANGE is from the INSIDE OUT.

Change your heart and your body follows. That's what I'm shouting about.

See, you haven't walked not one mile in my worn out shoes

nor lived one damn moment of my blues.

And you haven't sung not one note of my song...

It's by God's grace and His mercy that I've made it this long.

So I entered my Chrysalis and for28 straight days I let God shape my being

I was truly AMAZED.

Good bye to old hurts. Good bye to old pain.

Good bye to old friends.

Good bye to my old name.

No longer will this caterpillar walk with his head hanging down

just trying to survive scurrying aimlessly on the ground.

28 days of Revelation, 28 days of Reflection,

28 days of Meditation, 28 days of Introspection.

28 days that felt like 28 years, but on the 28th day a beam of light appeared.

With new strength and determination, I push and I twist.

I discover something miraculous is happening as I emerge from my Chrysalis.

I am not the same person I was when I went in.

Something is very different and I feel it WITHIN.

Alvin Fowlkes, the caterpillar that went into hiding had to DIE,

now I emerge ALVIN FOWLKES, the MONARCH BETTERFLY.

I am now a MONARCH. That means I reign SUPREME.

And I am AWESOME, I crush my haters like a Jelly bean.

I was kinda fly before, but I'm a BETTER FLY now

because now I know who I am and ain't no stopping me now.

I have no peers...yes that means I'm PEERLESS!

I have no fears....but I wouldn't say that I'm FEARLESS,

but I do FEAR LESS than I did before. My fear now motivates me to do SO MUCH MORE!!!

I have the heart of a lion and the strength of 100 men

and the courage of those same 100 times 10.

Yes, I am a BETTERFLY...better than before

and with these wings I BETTER FLY cuz God's got so much in store.

And I am ready for it all so I am about to take flight.

There no need to be afraid. I am headed toward the light.

And when I fly, I fly high....higher than anything can.

Higher than any bird, any plane, ANY man!

See when you fly this high, you don't have to look around.

When you the dopest thing in the sky, there is no need to look down.

So now just look up and you will see me streaking across the sky

into the bright sunlight....ALVIN FOWLKES, THE MONARCH BETTERFLY!!!!

 

 

Until next time….SHARPEN YOUR EDGE and your life will NEVER be DULL!

I am

The Sharp One

It’s Only a Test

I have a very dear friend who is in the midst of a battle; a battle for their soul and a battle for their sanity. My friend is very independent, strong, capable and determined, yet my friend feels helpless and confused at this time in their life. For my friend, this is out of the norm. See, my friend is very used to having all of the answers and making rational decisions. My friend is very educated (has a Ph.D.), very accomplished and highly intelligent; however the battle that my friend is going through has them stumped. My friend is attractive on the outside and inside to the opposite sex, outgoing, well spoken, well traveled and well versed; yet my friend can't seem to understand why they are going through this time.
How many times have you ever felt like this? Your life was just about to be on track and all of a sudden, something comes through and derails your thoughts and your emotions quicker than you can blink your eyes. Once you were cool, calm and collected, but that has now been replaced with fear, anger, anxiety and frustration. How could this be happening? Why is this happening? I am here to tell you. IT'S ONLY A TEST!
Every now and again, I believe God allows tests in our lives. Tests serves a few purposes; one purpose is to see how much we have learned and retained during our time of study; another purpose is to see how prepared we are to go to the next level. If we fall short in any of those categories, the results serve as a reminder that we still need preparation or that we are not yet ready to progress to the next level. That in and of itself can be frustrating; especially when we truly believe that we are ready for the next level. The truth is that sometimes the student has no clue if he or she is ready to progress; only the teacher who gives the test can evaluate the readiness of the student. In life, that teacher for us is God. When God gives us a test, we sometimes gripe and grumble because we aren't prepared properly for the test, or we simply don't want to take the test. Sometimes God will even give us a POP QUIZ just to see if we are paying attention in class. Other times, we know that the test is coming and yet we still choose not to study or prepare.
In my friend's case, this is a pop quiz. Out of the blue, the test came and my friend stands bewildered wondering why they are being tested. The answer is because it is time to move to the next level on ALL LEVELS. Mentally, emotionally, physically, financially…a breakthrough is inevitable; however, this test is necessary so that success is achieved on the next level. The test is a sign that PROMOTION is about to take place. The test is a sign that the NEXT LEVEL is in sight. Don't be upset with the test. Embrace the fact that the test is here because it means that you are about to be elevated. Your goal now is to pass the test. In life the only way to do that is to PRAY, LISTEN and ENDURE. Endurance is the key to completing the test and not throwing in the towel in haste.
Late 2009 and all of 2010, I was tested. It was the worst time of my life and I dealt with some of the most difficult things I could have imagined; paramount of all these things was the passing of my father. Do I still miss him? Absolutely. Every day, I think about him and I ache a little inside, but each day it gets a little easier. I will never fully recover from losing my daddy. I will always have emptiness in me that will gnaw at me forever, but each day I handle that pain a little better. I had other trials that surrounded me during this time, but 2010 is over, 2011 has begun, this phase of testing in my life is completed and I am looking at my report card. I got an A!!! I AM READY FOR PROMOTION….ARE YOU?
SHARPEN YOUR EDGE AND YOUR LIFE WILL NEVER BE DULL
Until next time,
I am
The Sharp One

SUPERMAN Syndrome

I suffer from an ailment that I have named “Superman Syndrome”.  It is a disease that most people don’t even realize that they suffer from, but if left untreated, it can cause sleeplessness, anxiety, mood swings, frustration, and physical illness and in rare cases….DEATH.  Let me explain to you what Superman Syndrome is and maybe you can see if you suffer from it too.

I am a caregiver and a nurturer; I have been my entire life. I have always felt the need to care for others and try to be there for other people.  People seek me out for advice, knowledge and wisdom and I am more than happy to oblige them.  It is very gratifying when people look up to you enough to want to hear what you have to say and what you think.  That’s the good news. Here’s the drawback.  When I myself am in need of someone’s guidance and advice, I don’t get reciprocal treatment from the people that I help; no one is there for me to help me to navigate through my issues and problems. It is not only frustrating, but it is extremely painful. How come the people that I listen to won’t listen to me? How come they won’t help me?  This made me resentful and bitter towards those people.

As I grew and matured, I realized that the fault really didn’t lie with the people that weren’t listening to me, but it actually was on ME. I know that doesn’t make sense, but that is part of the syndrome. Let me break it down like this: We all know who Superman is and what he was sent from his home planet to do here on Earth; Superman is the protector of the weaker and the savior of down trodden. He swoops in and saves people and takes them out of harm’s way. That is his job. That is his mission. However, when Superman himself is in trouble and needs help, can he realistically rely on the SAME PEOPLE THAT HE SAVES to save him???

NO!

WHY?

Superman’s personal problems, battles and fights are much, much bigger than the people that he saves; therefore, the people that he saves are NOT equipped to save him or help him. THEY ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO. So who saves Superman???  The answer is other HEROES that are equipped and ready to handle problems and situations on that level that Superman is used to dealing with alone. Batman, Wonder Woman, The Flash, and Green Lantern etc. are all powerful and are equipped to help someone like Superman. The average townsperson is nowhere near equipped for such a battle.  Can Superman fault them for that? Certainly not.

Now let’s look at our lives. Constantly we may help people, but when we are in need, we expect those same people to help us. The problem is that they may not be equipped to help us. That is not their fault. It is not your fault. That is the way that it is. Therefore, we need to seek help from people that are truly equipped to help us. The problem is because you are SUPERMAN; you may not feel that it is right for you to ask for help. After all….YOU ARE SUPERMAN AND SUPERMAN DOESN’T NEED HELP, RIGHT? 

WRONG?

The bottom line is we all need help at times, but we may be turning to the wrong people for help. God puts people in our lives that are ready and have the provisions to help us, but we may be too embarrassed, proud or stubborn to ask because we are so used to solving problems for others. I had to learn that I had to HUMBLE myself, swallow my PRIDE and ask people to help me; people that were EQUIPPED to help me with my struggles. I had to learn that the same people that confide in me, may not be the people that I can confide in NO MATTER HOW MUCH I MAY LOVE THEM. This is not about love. I can love them and care for them without looking to them for help and that is perfectly okay.  I have to know that however, when I do need that help, I can turn to people that may be SMARTER, WISER, MORE EXPERIENCED, RICHER OR MORE POWERFUL THAN ME.  That too is JUST FINE.  God did not put us here to do everything by ourselves. People are here to help each other. Why not take the chance and allow for the help.

The other part of the syndrome is understanding that as powerful as you are, YOU CANNOT HELP OR SAVE EVERYONE. You also cannot feel guilty or defeated because of this. WE ARE HUMAN. We are going to let other people down as well as let ourselves down. The key is to forgive ourselves and keep moving forward.

Now….

DO YOU OR A LOVED ONE SUFFER FROM SUPERMAN SYNDROME?  IF YOU DO…THERE IS HOPE.

The first step lies in you. Recognize that you have the disease and start treating it IMMEDIATELY

1.       Stop trying to solve everybody’s problems.

2.       Stop looking for the people you help to always help you.

3.       Start looking toward people that may be stronger than you and find strength to ask for help, trust and confide in them.

4.       Look in the mirror and say “I AM NOT SUPERMAN”

5.       REPEAT STEPS 1-4 AS OFTEN AS NECESSARY UNTIL YOU ARE RECOVERING.

There is no cure for this syndrome. If you are a nurture/caregiver type, then that is who you are; however, you can find the strength within to know when you can’t help anyone if you don’t first help yourself.

Make sense?  I hope so.

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SHARPEN YOUR EDGE AND YOUR LIFE WILL NEVER BE DULL

I Am

The Sharp One

Why Hate??

You know, I have NEVER understood HATERATION!! Term it however you want…drinking HATERADE, being a HATER, etc. Whatever you call it, it has never made any sense to me. Hating on people is about as productive as trying to count snowflakes as they fall to the ground. IT IS FUTILE. So why hate? Why do people hate? I have a few theories of my own.

1. People hate because they feel that you don't deserve what you have. What a stupid thing to do. How dare anyone stand in judgment of people and try to quantify the blessings that God has given them and self-righteously say "they have too much"??? People do this all of the time. When I bought my house, I had people ask me, why do you have so many bedrooms? BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT I WANTED AND GOD BLESSED ME WITH? Have you ever had anyone say to you that you don't need all that? I know you have. That is a sure sign of a hater.
2. People hate because they don't think they can achieve at the level that you have. That is crazy to me. We have the capacity to do all that we want to do in life. The question is…ARE YOU WILLING TO DO ALL THAT IT TAKES TO GET IT? Most people aren't. They say the grass is greener on the other side…do you know why? It is because of all of the fertilizer that was put on the grass. TRANSLATION: You don't know all of the shit I had to go through to get to where I am. Nobody knows what people actually go through to achieve the things they have achieved. Haters think that it just came easy. Haters are WRONG!
3. People hate because secretly they struggle with themselves and their esteem. Let's be real. There are a lot of people out there who just feel crappy about themselves and because of it, they treat others like garbage. How sad, but true. Because they feel so bad about themselves, they see everyone else as inferior or threats to their happiness. All hating does is BREED DEEPER INSECURITY. If you are constantly comparing yourself to other people, when will you ever see the good in you? How can you feel good about yourself when you are always comparing yourself to some standard that is irrational and unreasonable?
4. People hate because they want to be top dog. People hate on others that they feel have more than they do. They can't and aren't content with what they have…they want to have more and better things than everyone else. If you have a 50 inch LCD TV, they have to get a 55 inch LED. Once they get it they are fine….UNTIL they overhear that one of their friends has a 60 inch 3D LED. This creates a vicious cycle. They will never be satisfied with anything because the reality is people will have things that you don't. Guess what? That is OKAY!
5. People hate because they like it. Isn't that a sad fact?? Don't we all know people that thrive off of drama? Don't we all know people that stir up controversy all of the time? These are PROFESSIONAL HATERS. They have mastered the art of hating. They could write a book on how to hate and hate successfully. When you recognize those people, your best bet is to steer clear of them at all costs. HATE IS CONTAGIOUS. Think about your life. How many times have you been "talked into" not liking someone that you had absolutely no problem with, but your friend did? What did you gain (besides a headache) by doing that? I have PRO GRADE HATERS in my life right now. They don't hate on me, but I see them hate on other people. It's ridiculous.

Bottom line is this. IT TAKES WAY TOO MUCH ENERGY TO HATE, so why do it? If you are around a hater, use your hater to be your elevator to your next level. If you ARE the hater, then you need to ask yourself why and remedy the problem. The problem lies inside you and you have to be bold enough to take an honest look at yourself and discover why you are the way you are. HATERATION CAN BE CURED AND IT CAN BE PREVENTED. Consider this blog your inoculation.
I would love for you to comment on this subject in the comments section. Please share some of your insights about hate and hating. We want to hear what you have to say.
Until next time.


Sharpen your Edge and your life will never be Dull!
I am,
The Sharp One

You can’t tell me NOTHING!

I asked a question today via Facebook and Twitter:
WHAT DO A SMART MAN AND AN OLD DOG HAVE IN COMMON?
I got varying responses to this question. I won't go into what people said, but I will go ahead and tell you the answer:
YOU CAN'T TEACH EITHER ONE OF THEM
NOTHING NEW! (BAD ENGLISH BUT GREAT PHILOSOPHY..LOL)
(Note: please insert "woman" wherever you see "man". This is an Equal Opportunity Lesson (smile))
Let's examine this for a second. A SMART man is a person that knows everything and thinks that all that he knows is all that there is TO know; he spends so much time DEFENDING all that he knows that he doesn't shut his mouth long enough or check his ego long enough to discover that he has so much more to learn. Have you ever had a discussion with a KNOW IT ALL? Isn't it frustrating??? They've been around the world twice, shook everyone's hand and have the T-shirt to prove it. When you try to tell them anything, not only do they already know what you are talking about but they know that subject WAY BETTER than you. You stand there in amazement because EVERY SUBJECT you bring up, they have so much knowledge on it, it just "astounds" you (yes I am being sarcastic). If you did it, they did it better; if you went to a 5 Star Hotel, they stayed in the penthouse. If you went on vacation, they went too, but only they went First Class and were V.I.P. everything. Yeah….THOSE PEOPLE!
Now equate this to knowledge. You are trying to have a conversation about something and no matter what you say, no matter what you do, no matter what you bring up….they know it all!!! How is this possible? Here's the bomb shell….wait for it……..
IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!!
No one knows EVERYTHING, no matter how much they pretend to. We all have room to grow and learn. It is a WISE man that knows that he can learn from anyone and EVERYTHING around him. I am a college professor; I teach all of the Business curricula and advise students on career choice and job searches. I love what I do, and I have been told that I am very good at what I do. While I appreciate what people have to say about me, let me make one thing perfectly clear….I AM NOT PERFECT. I am always in a posture for learning. I learn from people around me that I know clearly are smarter and more knowledgeable than me; furthermore, I learn from the students that I advise and teach; they have knowledge about things that I don't have a clue about, but I am willing to listen and willing to learn. Let me share a story. I was displaced from a job back in 2009 and I had the privilege of working with a Career Planning Service. When I went to see my counselor, she asked me to bring her my resume' so that she could peruse it and make improvements; she pulled out a red ink pen and basically bled all over my resume' with red ink. She looked at me and said "I hope I didn't hurt your feelings". I looked at her and said "Look, this ain't about my feelings. I need a job. Your job is to help me get a job. My feelings aren't that fragile. You know what you are doing so do what you must, I can take it." She responded by saying "A lot of people take offense when I tell them the things that are wrong". I said "Well with all due respect, why the hell do they come to see you then?" She laughed and said "You know what…I don't know". Why would someone seek the help of a professional and turn around and tell the professional all that they are doing wrong or they perceive as wrong? One word….INSECURITY.
INSECURITY is a powerful force. When people feel insecure, there only mission is to make themselves feel safe and secure again. I grew up with low self-esteem and believe me, all I wanted to do was be secure and I was willing to achieve that at any cost. SMART people don't want to be questioned or have their knowledge challenged because they don't want the holes in their armor to be exposed. What the SMART man doesn't realize is if he took the time to examine the weaknesses in his armor, he would know how to FORTIFY his armor and make it better. The problem is he doesn't think he has any weaknesses. We all know that's just not true. PRIDE COMETH BEFORE THE FALL.
So….are you a SMART man or a WISE man? Can you be taught? Do you want to learn or are you comfortable being just the way you are and not being questioned? Take time to examine yourself and your ideology and ask yourself the question…."Am I so stuck in my own fantasy that I refuse to see reality?" If that is you, then BE WISE ENOUGH TO STOP BEING SMART.
PS. If you are a PARENT, this applies to you too. When is the last time you LISTENED to your children when they tell you what's wrong, instead of comparing how small their problems are in comparison to your big problems??? This is fodder for a future blog, but the question bore asking in this posting. Just something to think about…….hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
I will talk to you next time. Tomorrow, stop talking and listen to someone and let them tell you SOMETHING. J


Sharpen your Edge and your life will NEVER be Dull!


I am
The Sharp One

This is only a TEST

This is a test blog to see if my blog will automatically be sent to my Facebook and Twitter pages. Please bear with me as I do this test.

2011....We doin' it BIG LIKE JUPITER!

Did you REALLY say THAT????

Can you believe some of the stupid things that people let fly out of their mouths sometime? I sit back in amazement and listen to how people can say such crap and MEAN it! LOL
On Facebook I enumerated some things and I am going to add to the list.  Today's series is called:

COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF SH*T!!!

First statement: "This is just who I am" COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****! This is who you CHOOSE to be. You could change IF YOU WANTED TO. There is nothing motivating you YET to make the change. It is not critical yet, but ONE DAY IT WILL BE!

Second statement: "Christmas snuck up on me this year". COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****!! If you weren't able to do the things that you desired to do for people for Christmas then that is OK. If they love you, they understand. Christmas is EVERY YEAR, ON THE SAME DATE, IN THE SAME MONTH and it "snuck up" on you??? Really?? My birthday can sneak up on you, but NOT A NATIONALLY RECOGNIZED HOLIDAY!! Just say nothing. :-)  If you feel insecure about not being able to do things for Christmas, then you are entitled to feel that way; however, don't go out of your way and say how a holiday that we ALL know "snuck up" on you. Just tell the truth..."I wasn't able to do the things I wanted to do for Christmas this year." Nuff said. It is just what happened this year and that's ok. But the LIE is Christmas "snuck up" on you. That is the equivalent of me walking up to you face to face, calling your name the entire time and I touch you on the shoulder and you scream and jump saying "You snuck up on me". REALLY????

Third Statement: "It is what it is" COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****! I absolutely HATE this phrase. People say this when they feel they can't change things or when they don't want to change things. It is a statement of powerlessness. Just because it IS, doesn't mean that it has to BE. It can be changed. I am speaking to the people that accept mediocrity, dysfunction and sub par things as law. It is NOT what it is...It is what you ACCEPT!

‎Fourth Statement: "I didn't mean what I said". COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****! YOU MEANT WHAT YOU SAID; YOU JUST DIDN'T MEAN TO SAY IT. Words are like toothpaste from a tube. Once it's OUT it's OUT!! 2 times I really listen to people; when they are mad and when they are drunk. Inhibitions are down & they say what they think & feel. If you don't believe me, make someone mad enough & see what they say to you. BE WARNED.

‎Fifth Statement: "I don't need people". COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****! If God intended that we didn't need anyone, we would all inhabit a planet by ourselves. Since we don't, my guess is that you are going to need somebody at some point in your life. Let these three words set you free..."I NEED HELP". You will be fascinated at what that admission will do for your life.

‎Sixth Statement: "Don't let what he/she said bother you. It's just words". COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****! Words are the MOST POWERFUL THINGS EVER. Words can start wars, destroy self-esteem, bring destruction, etc. When someone says that sticks and stones crap...I tell them I would rather take the sticks and stones than ...have someone verbally assault me. WORDS ARE POWERFUL and in the wrong mouth can be DEADLY.

Seventh Statement: "People don't get my sense of humor" COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****! HOW ABOUT THIS, YOU AIN'T FUNNY AND you KNOW you AIN'T funny. Being sarcastic & cynical is NOT humor. That's called being a JERK! If you're the only 1 laughing while everyone else is silent..leave before there's a situation cuz when someone catches feelings, you gonna punk out and play "victim". I say again...YOU AIN'T FUNNY!

Eighth Statement: "I'm not mean, I am just brutally honest" COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****!  Yes, you are mean!Look at the word "brutal".  Do you ever hear anyone say that someone is brutally nice or brutally generous? NO! People get arrested for brutality. So how in the world can you think that brutal honesty isn't being mean? We have all heard the saying "the truth hurts". Well, yes the truth can hurt; do we really need brutality along with it? Brutal honesty is unnecessary. You don't have to be brutal in order to be truthful. People who are brutally honest are doing so because that gives them a sense of power and control over the person they are telling the truth to. I have seen people watch their words of truth really hurt someone, only for them to stand there and say "I'm not trying to hurt you, I am just being honest". How the hell would you feel if someone did something like that to you? You probably would want to fight them. There is a way to say everything. Let the truth be painful enough...save the brutality.

Ninth Statement: "I don't want to have a lot of money. I wouldn't know what to do with myself" COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****!  I get so tired of people that act like having a lot of money is a sin. IT IS NOT! I hope to one day have a lot of money. I want to go about it the right way and do it the right way, but I would LOVE to see what it's like to say "money is no object". Well, I will put it to you like this...every time you say, "I don't want to have a lot of money", you are GUARANTEEING that YOU WON'T. That's cool; I will gladly take your share. :-)

Tenth Statement:  Male statement "I am the man of the house"  COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****! Let me tell you something fellas...(I am putting my MBA on the shelf for a second and speaking the way I want) If you ain't got no job, don't pay no bills and ain't tryna find a job, you are NOT the man of the house. You are a BUM! Oh, and let's make this clear too. Just because you knockin' the bottom out (and we all KNOW what I'm talking about) don't make you the man of the house either! Eventually, she will find someone else to beat it up that HAS A JOB, PAYS THE BILLS AND HAS ASPIRATIONS TO BE BETTER. Sorry to be the one to tell you, but your days are numbered. My suggestion is to go out and find a job quickly, take your sorry butt back to school and get some much needed education and start talking about your goals. Your penis will not overcome BEING BROKE. If she is working and you are not...DISASTER.

Eleventh Statement: Female Statement "I am looking for someone to complete me" COME ON, THAT'S A CROCK OF ****!  Ladies.....REALLY??  Complete you? Listen to how that sounds. You need someone to make you whole??? You ARE whole. What you really want is someone to share your life with. Lady, I know that you want a person to love and you want that man to be your everything, but I have got a wake up call for you too sister. GOD IS YOUR EVERYTHING. Everything else falls short...including the man that you are looking for that you think will "complete" you. And let's be honest...he will NEVER complete you. He will always miss the mark. Why?? Because he's human.
One of the phrases I hate is when a woman tells a man to "man up". What the HELL??? Man UP!?!? When a woman says that, she means one of three things: 1. Be like this man that I made up in my mind. 2. Be like this man that I saw in the movies and TV ("Love and Basketball" has messed up many a man) or 3. Be like my father. In any of the three scenarios HE WILL FAIL!! He won't ever be like the dude you made up in your mind because you will keep changing him and making him (the dude in your mind) better and better while your real man gets worse and worse. He won't be like the dude on TV or in the movies because his character and dialog are SCRIPTED so he knows all of the right things to do and say. Your real man DOESN'T. He won't ever be like your father, because let's face it...who is better than your daddy?? And if you were/are "Daddy's Little Girl" that man is going to catch HELL. Just let him be the best HIM that he can be. If that falls short or if his best is LAME AT BEST, then chuck up the deuces and BOUNCE.

Hope this opened your eyes and made you laugh some too! At the end of the day, all we can be is the best we can be, but we have to strive to be our best. Let's start in a positive direction and get rid of these statements.  Please don't be mad at me, I'm not being mean, I am just brutally honest. LOLOLOLOLOL [ GOTCHA! :-) ]

Sharpen your Edge and your life will never be dull.

I am
The Sharp One